Why I’ve Already Lowered My Goodreads Goal & Catch Up: ARCs, Slumps, and Rants.

You may have seen the lack of books in my recent posts. 

I discussed ARCs, sure, but normally I’d have a few more book related posts (review, rant, etc) a month. And, recently, I just haven’t been really feeling talking about books. And, I haven’t really been bothered about reading much either.

And, I’ve read one book this year/month.

I cannot blame that on being busy. I cannot blame that on a slump. I haven’t read much because I feel GUILTY every time I read. I feel guilty every time that I read a book that isn’t an ARC. But I feel guilty even reading an ARC because I have a really important few months coming up where I’m going to be having a lot of exams soon and I need to be revising for those.

I feel guilty that I’m not studying, even though right now the studying should be maybe an hour extra an evening on top of homework (and the homework covers maybe 2 hours a night? so not a lot). And even though I really don’t have THAT much work to be doing,* and I’ll happily sit and watch youtube for an hour, and not feel guilty about it. Or I’ll happily sit down and write a post in the afternoon and not feel guilty. But the minute I open a book I feel guilty.

*yet

And, as well as this, I’ve lowered my Goodreads goal. And even though I raised it by only 5 (or ten???) books more than last year, it just felt so unachievable. Because, frankly, I don’t think that I’ll achieve the same amount as last year since I have so much work ahead of me. Right now I may not have masses of work, but later I will, and if I’m not reading now, there’s no way I’ll be able to catch up later.

And yes, this may seem dramatic, but I get SO stressed, SO easily and I turn into a flailing lamb and I think that right now I need to remove any potential stress from my life*, and that means not worrying about how much I’m reading, and therefore just read when I read and see how it goes from there.

*but this means books so I won’t be doing that!! 

life/writing

• So I got my results back from the mock exams that I did in December. I’m happy with a few, over the moon with a few, and ok with the rest and disappointed in one. But what I’m taking away from this is that now I can improve for the real exams later.
• I’ve also become a lot more settled with all the drama that was going on in my friendship group. I’m no longer really friends with them, but we get still get on and things aren’t as tense and my anxiety isn’t RAGING THROUGH THE ROOF. I don’t think as deeply about the situation and now have really nice people I can rely on in school.
• I went to a blogger meet up this month which was really nice.
• I started writing poetry again though only until a few days ago because I can’t actually stick to anything. I might share some soon.
• I’ve written NOTHING extra to my WIP and I need to get motivated to write again. Though, saying this, I may just prolong starting to write again until my exams are over (though that is a really long time).
• School is actually becoming a bit overwhelming since I have lots of design work to do and need to them go in during the HOLIDAYS to do work so that I can finish by the deadline since I’ve overloaded myself with work.
• Saying that I’m becoming a bit more organised?? I’ve got all these apps now that literally sort my life, but I haven’t been using them for very long, so we’ll see how that goes.

reading

• So as you read above, I haven’t been reading much lately.
• I mean, a book a month?? GREAT GOING, LU.
• However, I am slowly making my way through a Gentleman’s Guide To Vice and Virtue. It’s a little slow (but not really???) and that’s kind of expected with a historical fiction???
• It’s funny and witty and I love Percy and fjkgnkdfjngkfj. I wish I could read it faster, but SLUMP.
• And I also received my first ever Physical ARC/finished copy of a book from the author and I am so looking forward to reading it! I mean,,, hopefully, I read it soon??? I feel SUPER bad for not being able to read ARCs/books in a few days!! USGBDS. Why can’t I be a better reader? (ha lol… tb to that post I wrote)*
• I’m also reading another ARC/finished copy from an author and I really can’t wait to read that too. BUT, AGAIN, SLUMP.
• And then I’m also going to be rereading City of Bones with Ruby before we buddy read Lord Of Shadows. But we’re BOTH IN SLUMPS (kind of??) so. . . soon-ish? No promises!!

*I’m so great at self-promo don’t even lie. 

What’s been going on with you guys lately? What are you reading? Have you been writing anything lately? Any projects/wips that you’re working on? Let me know!

Luuuuu